Random Acts of Kindness Such a Blessing

As most who read this know my husband of 37 years was diagnosed with esophageal cancer in August. He will finally be starting treatment of radiation and chemotherapy next week. The treatments will be done in Tucson at the University of Arizona Medical center and the Veterans Administration hospital. Because of the distance and frequency of the treatment we will be staying in Tucson and possibly coming home on weekends if he feels like it.

Since the diagnosis we have made numerous trips to Tucson almost 2 or more a week. It has been hard for him as well as the family to deal with all that is going on and what is coming up in the future. The unknown and uncertainty. The only thing I do know is we will get through this with the help of everyone and the blessings from our Heavenly Father.

I have been blessed with so many random acts of kindness that I had to share how much it has meant to us and especially me. Thank you to anyone who has said a prayer or done anything on our behalf they mean more than you can even imagine.

Some of these random acts of kindness are cards from old friends, cards from family members, calls, postings on the caring bridge http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/budsjourney
things from a neighbors garden, a Halloween treat from a friend, postings on myspace http://www.myspace.com/scrapin_grandma, emails, ecards, and I am sure there are more I don't remember right at this moment. All I can do is thank my Heavenly Father for such wonderful family, friends and neighbors. I am so blessed.
Thank you all so very much.

I pray I can brighten someone elses day by doing a random act of kindness for them, that will mean as much as these random acts of kindness have meant to me.

WAITING

Wow who would have thought that, this activity would be so hard to do. My husband and I were told on August 11th that he has esophageal cancer. Ok so my thought is now what when does treatment start?

Not that easy. He has had more tests and biopsies to see what stage it is. Well, this past Wed we were told it is stage 3 and it will be the 30th of Sept before we will see the oncologist and find out what the plan of treatment will be. They have said surgery is probably not an option because of his other health problems. So that leaves Chemo and radiation. So when will it start and what can we do? Hopefully that will be answered on Tuesday.

It has been made worse because of the mixups of people who are incompetient in their jobs and have no oversight to see that things are done as requested. I am very upset with the Veterans Administration for those problems. Yet on the other hand I am very thankful that he has that help or he would not get the treatment he needs.

If you read this and can send a prayer on his behalf that would be greatly appreciated. We know the power of prayer and have faith that with prayer and medical assistance he will make it through this journey of his life. Thank you and have a great day.

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/budsjourney

This is a website to get updates on Bud and how he is doing. I think I did it more for me than him to feel like I was doing something. The guest messages will be helpful to him and the rest of the family as well. The more positive we can stay the better.

There is nothing I can do about his illness just pray and do my best to take care of him. It will give me a way to let others know how he is doing without having to send a bunch of emails all the time and worry that I have forgotten someone. This will let anyone who wants to keep up with his treatment to do so by checking that site. I feel frustrated and angry with the VA for not doing something sooner. Now that we know what is going on we will make sure he is seeing the right dr in the right amount of time and not just sitting around being sick and waiting for the VA to do something!!!!

Call it Fate, Call it a coincidence, Call it Law of Attraction, Whatever you call it I was amazed


Let me start at the beginning to explain how this all took place. When I was young before my mom and dad got a divorce, we would go to a small town in AZ about a 5 hour drive from where we lived to visit some friends of my parents. They were a large family and we had a great time visiting when we went. Several years ago one of the girls went to the local utility company and asked for my address after explaining the childhood connection she was given my address. We visited and kept in touch, with Christmas letters until a few years ago. We would visit when they came to town for the Old Time Fiddlers Contest held here once a year.

This past week we rented a UHaul to move some of our things to the cabin in the White Mountains that we bought. We went on Sat to return it to the small town about 30 miles from where the house is. We looked and could not find the location so called UHaul and found out they no longer were doing UHaul and we would have to take it to another small town, 40 miles north of where we now were. So we headed north to find the new location. When we found the business we had to wait quite a long time for them to check it in as this was their first time doing it. A new UHaul business. While waiting we talked and they told us of a good place to eat down the street.

When we left there to get something to eat I told Bud, "I wish I had asked about if they knew the friend who had looked me up." I knew this was the town she lived in but did not know her address or phone number. We went in to eat and all the while I kept saying and thinking I wish I had asked them. Well, I got up to use the restroom before we left and on my way back to the table I saw a man with his son sitting in a booth near us. I said excuse me and asked if he had lived in the town long. He said about 8 years as he looked at me puzzled. I asked if he knew the friend by the last name only and he said which family? there were more than one by that name. I told him her last name and he said he was her brother. You could have knocked me over I was so shocked for him to say that. I told him who I was and he remembered us and we had a good little visit. He told me he did not often eat at that place and just happened to stop by right then. He called her and she was not home but we exchanged phone numbers so I hope to get in touch again and visit when we get up that way.

I was shaking and could hardly wait to call my sister in Alaska and tell her of my quite by chance meet. She was shocked as well as to how it all happened. Well, whatever you want to call it I am happy we have a chance to reconnect.

We Had a GREAT time!!!
We are saying today why does it hurt so much to have such a good time? We left on Monday from home at 5:00 AM and went to PHX to catch a plane (Southwest the best) and flew to LAX. It was the 6 of us Scott, Becky, her dad and sister, Bud and me.
We were taken by transport van to the harbor and we boarded the ship. It was all so new and exciting for us. It was really like going into a secure building. They do all the same security stuff as the airport except you can leave your shoes on and that happens every time you leave and return to the ship. We had received all the information/tickets by mail. We went to our cabin a small one with two twin beds pushed together to make a king size bed, a built in desk, small closet and tiny bathroom like a camp trailer.

We looked around the ship and went to dinner. The beginning of many wonderful encounters with great tasting, out of this world FOOD. The menu had different things on it each night and there was an appetizer, main entree and fabulous desserts.

During the trip I wanted to eat all the foods that I had never tasted and probably never would have the chance again. You see the food is all included in the price so there is no charge at the time of the meal. You could order one thing or everything off the menu. I was able to taste and enjoy escargot, lamb, duck, ma hi ma hi, cold fruit soups, like watermelon and pear. I also ate a warm soup of pumpkin and apple so good. The breads were different and we could choose what they passed around. The server an assistant waiter was from Peru and a real delight to have her serve our table. The servers were the same each night and we had an assigned table. The waiter very nice but he was not as friendly as she was, I forgot where he said he was from.

I don't think anyone working on the ship are Americans. They were from different countries and so all had strong accents and sometimes hard to understand but they all spoke English. They were all very friendly and helpful. I would say the ship was the happiest place on earth and not Disneyland because the workers on the ship were happier than those at Disneyland when we went in March.

The first evening Bud was so tired he went to the cabin and the rest of us went to the comedy show and it was so funny, we laughed and laughed. The ship has a small casino that is open when the ship is in international waters. It is very small but had a few fun machines to play to sorry to say I did not win. It did not take long to get rid of my $20. Bud the second night went and he did win a bit, he seems to always be the lucky one. It was fun anyway.

When we woke up the 2ND day we were docked at San Diego. Bud and I were really tired and of course the migraines did not stay at home either so we stayed in bed late and stayed on the ship. We went to the buffet for lunch it was too late for breakfast. We had lots of good food again. They have lots to choose from including hot dogs and hamburgers for every lunch and dinner. They had lots of different foods from different countries and the best desserts of any buffet. Again there was no charge as it too was included in the cruise fees. The buffet was open from 6 AM to 9:30 PM everyday.

We sat on the deck and looked at San Diego it was beautiful with a low fog. It was cool and was fun to watch the people on the board walk. That night after dinner we went to another comedy show that had some singing and dancing.

The next morning we were anchored just off of the shore of Catalina Island. We boarded a large water taxi that took us to the beautiful, foggy island that was mostly covered with fog. We rented a 6 seater golf cart and Scott drove us around the Island. The pictures I took do not do the flowers on the trees justice they were so vibrant of color and breath taking. I also walked along the shore on the sand in the water nobody else wanted too. I could not come that close to the ocean and not walk in the sand. The water taxi took us back when we were ready it ran every 30 min.

I have so many pictures to scrap. Every time we exited or returned to the ship they took pictures hoping we would buy them all. That afternoon I watched an ice carver sculpt an angel fish from a 200 pound block of ice in about 10 minutes. Of course I got pictures of it as well as pictures all around the ship. After that I went to a bingo game and a shopping class. I learned about shopping in Encenada Mexico our next stop. Everyone else was taking a nap I was tired and hurt, but did not want to waste my time in the cabin.

That night was the captains night formal dinner. We all dressed up and the photographers too professional pictures that turned out pretty good. It was nice to see Bud in a suit jacket and all dressed up. That night we all went to a very good singing and dance show. The entertainers are very good, I was surprised.

The next morning we woke up docked at Encenada Mexico and we all went to the shopping area but Scott. He stayed on the ship. In the class I took the instructor gave us a shopping map and told us there would be drawings at certain times at different shops, but we could also pick up drawing slips for a drawing to be held on ship that evening. So we got our slips while shopping. We did not buy much, not for the lack of them trying to get us to. The street merchants followed us around wanting us to buy things. It was hard to say no but we did. After returning to the ship we ate and rested, by this time we were exhausted. We did take a nap and rest until it was time for the ship to leave the dock and we went to watch. I was so neat it is just hard to describe, it is something that has to be experienced. We hoped to see some dolphins but we didn't. At dinner the wait staff did a program for us it was really funny. We went to the drawings from the slips we picked up in town and of the 6 they gave away I won 3, Becky won 1. Yippee!!

That night there was another very good dance and singing show, we really enjoyed it. In the center of the ship that night at 11:30 PM they had a chocolate buffet it was fantastic. There were ice sculptures and fruit sculptures, in the shape of dragons. Lots of chocolate molded things like a gigantic tiger and some chocolate pillars. The food they served was laid out beautifully as well as tasting fantastic. I am afraid to weigh I know I must of gained at least 10 pounds on the ship but enjoyed every minute of it. It was hard to go to bed knowing it was the last night we would be on the ship. Each night we returned to our cabin there were towel animals on our bed, a bunny, a monkey hanging on a hanger from the ceiling and the last night was a swan. They were so neat. We also had chocolates on our pillow each night.

We returned to LA and got a van shuttle back to the airport. We were early getting there so had to wait a while in the airport. We did some famous people hunting as we waited but did not see any. We did sit a few rows back from Ice Tea who plays a character on one of our favorite shows Law and Order. We did not get close enough to talk to him or get an autograph. He did shake hands with others who recognized him as they passed him while taking their seats. We had a wonderful time and both of us are so anxious to go on another cruise although it will be awhile before we can go again. I would recommend it to everyone!!!! It is worth the aches and pains that we are still having from the trip and recouping.

Pain is so different for everyone. Take for example when you go to the dr and they ask you if you are in pain and to put a number on it between 1 and 10. Well, a 2 for one person may be the same pain but a 7 for someone else. I think about this because with migraines www.migraineresearchfoundation.org almost daily (some weeks it is daily for weeks at a time) and having fibromyalgia http://www.fmaware.org/site there is always some kind of pain in my body. Some migraines are even more painful than others. It is painful to lay down, where the body meets the mattress it hurts, getting a hug (which I always encourage, as I am a hugger) is painful. When people say they hurt how is it possible to compare if their pain is worse or the same as yours. Comparing is not necessary except for doctors to know how to treat.

I am thankful for and blessed by family and friends who are always sharing information they hear or see on TV, magazines or other sources. Believe me I have heard and tried them all. I have been to pain specialists and to neurologists and had lots of different tests and there is no rhyme or reason for the migraines only that they are there. As far as I can remember I have had migraines for most of my life. Of course back in the days when I was a child migraine was not a common diagnosis so my mother was told to cut my long hair and keep it short to help prevent the head aches I suffered. I was sent to eye doctors to have my eyes checked because, I must have needed glasses, which I did but it made no difference in the head aches. Then it was oh she is a nervous child so that is why she is having head aches. As time passed all the treatments did not help. When I was an adult and would go to the doctor I was told I needed to reduce the stress in my life and that would reduce the headaches. Then finally one day a doctor told me I had migraines and tried different types of medications to prevent them which did not work. For years I would suffer them out and if I could go to the doctor to get some kind of shot to help with the pain and nausea but it would only put me to sleep. As I got older and they increased in number and intensity it was so hard to work and suffer through the pain. I would try and some days just had to go home. I remember hearing comments from coworker like "I wish I could go home when I have a head ache" which made the fact that I was suffering even more stressful and irritating. I was thankful for and still am for the invention of imitrex injections. I have tried the nasal spray and the pills with no relief. The injections help the most and at one point when I was trying to work with migraines and had good insurance I was taking as many as 36 shots a month. I had a prescription filled yesterday for 6 imitrex injections and it was $385.00 and I don't have good insurance any more. So out of pocket that is not possible on a regular basis so I suffer it out most of the time. Some doctors have given me samples of other migraine meds that I have tried with some relief. I splurged you might say because we are going on a trip next week and I do not want to be having migraines that will keep me in bed during the trip.

Migraines are hereditary and I understand my mother, her sister and their mother all suffered from them and I have learned as well that my fathers, father also had severe headaches but were not diagnosed migraines because that was not a common diagnosis in those days. My father was an alcoholic dying at the age of 41 and he would refer to his alcohol as medicine so it leaves me to wonder if he had migraines too and that was his way of getting rid of them. I will never know. I am sad to say my children suffer from them now as adults and I wish they did not have to bare that burden.

As for the fibromyalgia I am thankful for the pain medication I get, as well as the new medication Lyrica, www.lyrica.com/ that has given me more freedom although the pain is never fully gone. There are so many other symptoms of this disease that they can not all be listed but, they are hard to deal with even though they are not visible to others. http://www.restministries.org They may not be visible to others, but are still debilitating, such as hypersensitivity to sound, brain fog, insomnia, chronic fatigue when you want to stay awake but your body just won't let you, etc. It is also hard to hear well, so and so has FMS/Fibro and they don't have that or they can still work. That is good I am happy for them. I would not wish any of these health issues on my worst enemy. Like most illnesses they effect each person differently. I would much rather be working than spending the time in bed. Just because I have time now, my body won't allow me to do the things I would love to be doing.

I am thankful for what I am able to do and even though it has taken me quite sometime to accept that I cannot do what I used to and that my brain does not work like it used to I still have things I can do. Some days depression is heavy and I struggle to make it out of the dark, I do know there is always a better day in the future. I also know that even though it may be hard to realise now, there is a reason for everything and I thankfully accept that and look forward to the many blessing the future will bring.

I am thankful for my husband, children and other family members and friends who are here to help and support me when I need help.

We have bought a cabin in the White Mountains of AZ and so I have been getting some things ready to be moved up there. We are not moving just going to have a place to go to when it is so hot here and cool off. We hope to spend alot of time there but coming home at least once a month. It will be very cold and snowy in the winter so not sure how much time we will spend there in the Winter.

While going through drawers of an old desk, that we plan to move up there, I have come across alot of old mail that I saved. Not sure why at the time I saved it but while reading through some of it I am glad I saved it.

There are letters from old friends I went to school with and they are great to reread and remember what was going on 20+ yrs ago in their lives and ours. Letters from family members telling what was happening with them good and bad, they are letters I will now save and scrapbook for my children and others to read. I have found letters from people I don't even remember and that makes me sad as they must have been important in our life at that time. They sounded like neighbors who had moved and kept in touch for awhile.

I had many penpals when my children were young who became as close as family although we never met in person. Some were older and were like an adopted mom and others had children the same ages as mine and it was fun to compare notes. I have found pictures of these people too that now I can also scrapbook so my children will know how important snail mail friends were to me at one time.

As I think of these letters from close family members, friends and penpals it reminds me of my space and email where we can communicate with others but on a computer instead of paper. How will the future generations know about the friends we make on the computer when things are not kept in hard copy like they were back in the day of only snail mail? I remember how excited I used to be to get a long letter and be able to catch up with people I had not seen in sometime or maybe never.

Even talking on the phone long distance was not something that was done like it is now. In todays world we can pick up a phone and call long distance for no extra charge, just like sending an email for no extra charge. Boy have times changed!!

It is a reminder for me why scrapbooking what I do is so important for future generations to know what it was like back in the the old days as they will say. I wish I had more to read about of my family from the old days that are old to me.

I am so thankful for all the beauty around me and all my blessings. Tonight I drove just less than a mile out of town here to see if I could find some wildlife and WOW was I able to see over a dozen beautiful Elk. They were grazing on the mountain side by the highway, oblivious to the cars that pass, or stop to look at them. They are so used to it I guess they stop and look up and then go on about their business. Some were so close to the side of the road they were about a cars link away. This is not an unusual sight. I try to drive out there when I can whenever I am up here in the mountains. At first I would take my camera and try to photograph them and then when I got them printed they were all abunch of pictures with Elk in them and looked the same. Now my Elk fever with the camera is gone and I just sit in my truck and watch them and all the beauty around them. My cousin Sam took us around about 4 yrs ago and showed us all the Elk we could find. I had always seen these magnificent animals in pictures with large antlers. I asked where were they and he let me know they don't have any at this time of year.

We are not usually here when they get there antlers but this yr I hope that will change. We have purchased a cute 2 bedroom cabin in town here and it will give us an opportunity to stay here or come up here in the cooler weather. We won't close on it until mid July so I am here still in the 27' camp trailer I have stayed in for the past 3 yrs. It is plenty big enough for me and usually one of my grandsons to come with me. This time I am alone and one of them will come next time. After the house closes Bud will be able to come too and that is exciting and also to see how happy he is to be able to come and have a place to come. He hates small places and so was not comfortable in the trailer when he did come. I am thankful that he will be able to come as well.

I have so many blessing too many to list but I am thankful for all of them. I am thankful too for all my family and friends and look forward to you coming up for a cool visit soon.

I am BACK #2

Well if anyone has read this they will see that I am not very good at keeping this blog up. Well I will just say I am trying again. As for the last post in Sept. 07 I was so gung ho to lose weight and tried again in Jan 08 but here I sit just as big as ever. Did lose some but of course I didn't hide very well and it found me again. At this point I am forgetting it and just going to try and eat healthier. Wish me luck.

I have been thinking of blogging again alot because I need to keep track of my feelings etc. Just for me and for future generations, if they would even care to read about them.

Having a positive attitude it what we (I) need and I do try. Tonight we had a Red Hat activity and it was fun. Today on the Oprah show she had an author who was talking about how important it is that everyone has fun on a daily basis for good heath along with several other things. The FUN thing really got to me because it is not a daily activity for me. After reading Eckhart Tolle's A New Earth I have started trying to go outside everyday and just sit and enjoy nature. BEING PRESENT in the moment. FUN though is another story.

I enjoy spending time with my grandchildren and most of the time when I feel ok we do have fun. I have fun with my Red Hat group and when I am doing things that I enjoy but that definately is not everyday. I am going to try to do that everyday. A friend recently told me that I sound sad in my emails and I never thought about that. I don't usually tell very much about myself in an email so that may be the reason, but come to think of it I am sad more than I am happy. That is my fault! I am working on that as well after reading A New Earth.

Tomorrow I will be picking up my grandsons that live nearby after school so I intend to do something fun with them. I will tell you what we did tomorrow.

I have pretty much been in be the past three days and up only this afternoon to go to the RH activity. I pray that I will feel good tomorrow so I can do somethings that need to be done. I have baby gifts and a wedding that need to be delivered. Need to get things ready to go to Alpine on Friday.

I am very thankful for my many blessings. My husband who is patient with me and accepts me for all my faults. For my children and grandchildren and all they do for me. I am thankful I have a nice home and plenty to eat, income and medical insurance. I am thankful for my friends who also accept me for my faults. I am Thankful for a Heavenly Father who has given me my life and his son to die and pay for our sins. I am Thankful for prayer answered and my abilities. I have so many things to be thankful for and hope to continue to share all my gratitude as time goes on. I pray for my family and friends health and safety, for a good day tomorrow and that Bud will feel better and that the Drs will figure out what is going on with his health.